Nepalian Dynamite

And so in Conclution...

2006-06-18T21:02:00.000-07:00

Im just reading though all the past posts and comments that I missed at the time

Highlights include...

1. Angus's Facial Rash
2. Yak eating my soap so deservedly chased
3. Stabbing some gropy guy on a bus
4. Smacking over some guy in a marketplace for groping me
5. Any other random acts of violence/groping
6. Vomiting at yet another major tourist detination...Taj Mahal
7. Secret booty call handshakes
8. Having a 6 year old exclaim in suprise " Jim-didi you STILL fat!"

freaking priceless....as they say

Nepali Road, Take Me Home

2006-06-18T20:34:00.000-07:00

Well thats it. Its over and done:In 72 hours I'll be home and Nepal will continue on without me. Its been doing pretty well for the last thousand years or so, so I think it will be ok I guess.

These last few days have been fantastic and now I don't want to come home! Fidels or not. The kids were fine and dandy, it was so great to spend a few days with them and see just how much they had grown in the few months I've been away. And noticing the changes I know that I'll be back again soon as can, I just dont want to miss out on all their growing up, like Yoyo getting her hearing aid, Sunita A getting more mobile (she's having another operation) and just seeing them all a little bit bigger and brighter than before. Bistachaap is just the same; calm and green and timeless. The paddies had just been harvested and at night you look down to bonfires of chaff being burnt down in the valley.

I've met some great people and nothing brings all nationalities together like the world cup. Or drive them apart for that matter. Last night found a large group of Voluteers swilling Everest Beer, smoking cheap Yak cigarettes and cheering wildly (or ogling fit young men) in the Australia vrs Brasil game at Budda Bar. Nobody (but the aussies) really cared who was winning or not, so it was a great night of cheap beer, momos and loud conversation.

So in a few hours i'll bargin my way into a taxi and off to the airport. One night in Bangkok later and I'll be headed home...reluctantly.

Living On A Prayer

2006-06-13T04:48:00.000-07:00

I am not dead

That said I am very tired and pretty much look dead. Sun burnt, 3 months re-growth, not much fooding and dirty feet make for a preettty atractive Jim right now. As I can't be assed writing a complete blog right now I've cut and pasted an email I sent my parents last night. I think it speaks for its self in terms of bad spelling, grammer and conherance just how tired I truely am. Names have been not been changed.

"That was the most PAINFUL TOURTURE i have endured so far. Im metally
exhasted (see spelling) my Train from Varanasi was 9 HOURS LATE!!!!!!!!!!!
so thats 9 hours waiting at the train station then 15 HOURS not knowing if i
would make my non-refundable flight. Eyes closed praying hard that i would make it in time Half the time the train wasnt even moving so we just sat there, it was sohot i really really smell now but i have to eat something and send this before i do anything else. When i
arrived at Kolcutta at 3.30 ten minutes after the flight depature time but
was banking on the flight beign delayed like EVERYTHING ELSE IN THIS COUNTRY

OF HELL so ran through thr station rugby forward style literally bowling
people down found a taxi with the most non english speaking driver possable
(everytime i yelled go go he would stop) and off we went slowly as Kolcutta
traffic is so bad. to make thing worse the driver just diddnt pick up on my
EXTREME agitation and kept asking me to sing "country song" guessing he
meant "from my country" not a rousing rendition of "Jolene" i could only
remember the words to the theme song from "friends" so that sufficed. at the

airport the only money i had left was a 500 ruppee note to pay for a 250
fare and you could see the delight in his eyes when he realised i was in too

much of a hurry to find change. Certainly made his day. The guy at the
security check told me id missed my flight but the next guy told me it was
DELAYED!!!!!! YEY HA!!!! i actully shouted for joy!! so off i went with a
few hiccups and catches......lost pocket knife number two. tryed to skip
security. Got my hair stuck on the bathroom
tap...................................now Nepal. Its a cool 28 degrees.
Heavan!! everything seems calm and familer.....oh so tired now"

So you see I'm back in Nepal and it is great like being home. In the Kolcutta I actully danced with joy to be leaving India behind. Its such an overwhelming place. Kathmandu I love you!!!Visited my friends and just sitting chatting about nothing was such a break from the rush of it all. I've just got back from assiting with the health checks at Charity Nepal one of the orphages that voluteers like I was are working. Great to see the kids again and to help out just has me planning to return again already. Tomorrow I'm going out to the orphanage I was at to visit for a few days before home. There is a new orphage being built there so painting and sanding to be done. I'm keen so lending a hand....not so keen on lentils and rice again. I still can't stomach that after a year away! Can't wait to see the kids again......little blighters

Ooh Sweet Child of Mine (and a small fries)

2006-06-05T21:02:00.000-07:00

I'm on the winddown now feeling like its almost time to head home and after the madness, frustration and lunacy this place has thrown at me over the last weeks I'm actully looking forward to it. Its been half silent screaming half wonderful....sometimes too hard to tell the two apart.
I'm back in Dehli again not a fantastic place but compared to where I spent the last few weeks seems like Tommorrowland. All flashy rickshaws and brand-name shops.....I sat in McDonalds today with my McCurry Puff (not kidding) and small coke in a bubble of young Delhi-ites in jeans basking in the air-con and ambiant strains of "sweet child of mine". Amazing considering 3 days ago I was riding a camel into the desert and sleeping in the sand dunes (yes romantic in terms of stars, dessert winds, lofty camels and the flattering light of a camp fire but a little less glossy when you take into account my aching butt from camel saddle, that i was so covered in sand and sweat i looked like a native of Tantooine and i lay in front of the camp fire in a heap due to my malnourished status but all this will fade and only memory of the deep love between my trusty camel and I will endure. Fingers Crossed. Jasilmer,the fort where I stayed when I wasn't swaying across the sands, rises right out of the rock exactly like a giant sand castle. It had to be one the coolest places to stay in India. You can stay right in the walls of the fort which were riddled with highly carved houses and warren like streets run every which way. But so damm hot. The flames of hell sounded refreshing as you hid from the sun between 11 and 4 and the temp reaches up to 49 degrees. Nights were spent sleeping on the roof where I looked down over the town below straight over the rest of the town also spending the night in the open air hopeing for a breath of air. The second night stareing up at the sky I felt a gust a hot air and sat up to see a huge wall of sand moving toward the city. Everyone paniced rushing for shelter to avoid getting sandblasted by the sand storm. Its a intrusive gritty fine dust that gets into you throat and eyes in a second and took the house boys several days to sweep the whole place clean from top to bottom. Much worse if it gets into your freshly washed underwear!! WHY GOD WHY!!!!!!! I'm still getting it out of my ears (note: dust not underwear)

Anyway I'm pooped so off to bed for me.....Chapati wishes and Camel-themed dreams

Jim's Whimsical Twinkly Happy Times

2006-05-23T07:26:00.000-07:00

yeah yeah time of my life....I'm hot and tired and dusty, went to the bottom of the sub-continant, had my palm read, symbolically threw out the demons in my mind into the Indian Ocean, ate a mango icecream,tryed to get a room, got overcharged, had a tantram about everyone thinking im a rich westerner, refused to pay so much, had to sleep in the train station, got told that several men during my travels had booty called me using a secret handshake and i just hadnt known it, was grossed out by a dead dog, killed 3 large cockroches, spent 8 extra hours on a train 'cause i slept in, got overcharged, got stared at alot, had a crazy dream that when i got back my flat was a reproduction of the Taj Mahal, sat on a wooden bench on the overcrowded death train from hell for 9 hours, ate some squid that i bought from a man with one eye (bob-cat-man), got stared at, bought the best mango i've ever tasted, dropped the last half out the door of the train by mistake, failed for the second week to do any laundry, got overcharged and finally pretty much am running out of cash and time.

I think that covers it. I'm in Mumbai.

Ghandi out

Pictorial Tour of India with Jim

2006-05-15T20:52:00.000-07:00

Fruit and vege market, Mysore. Biggest spiders I've ever seen hiding in the bananas

Hampi...jungle book/bedrock,mozzies as big as your hand and a million gekos.

Insense and dyes in the Devaraja Market, Mysore.

I love Train. It's the best way to travel. So Marcus Lush right now.

Traditional mehndi (henna) on me big ol' hand. Its now really faded and looks like shit....literaly

5.30 am Jim enjoys a Jain buddist moment at the top of 970 steps at Sravanbelagola

Cramped, hot, smelly and on my way to Ooty by steam train.

Typical touristy shot at the Maharaj's Palace, Mysore. Please note: it was laundry day. Desperate times means resorting to Plumbing World T-shirts.

My gift is Mysore and this one's for you

2006-05-09T23:59:00.000-07:00

For you those of you who know me well you will know that I hate ceiling fans. A strange thing to despise but I always think that one day one will wobble loose from its grip on the ceiling and plunge down and chop me up into ragged chunks. A pointless and undignified way to die ( other entries under Jim's crap ways to die include "death by coconut to head" and "Of mortification after falling down a long drop toilet" I have had anxiety dreams about all three). So I surprise myself by falling victim to Stockholm Syndrome, I love the thing I hate. I love fan. Im too cheap to pay for Air Con both on the train or in my hostels. Actually im so cheap that my hostels don't even offer A/C. And as a busy manager of a cruddy hostel in India where young travelers will sleep on a mildewed rug just to pay 20 cents why bother with installing a/c when you can have death fans. Leaves you free to oil you hair, grow you fingernails really long and make fat jokes with young kiwi girls named Jim. Priceless. On the train down from Hampi to Mysore (which I only came to really cause you have to go up Mysore street to get to Ma and Pa Bakers) I went sleeper class which means open windows with a grill, three tiers of bunks and the dreaded fans of doom (these ones are caged for your safety). The fans suck in the dust and when I sat up in the morning I could see the thick red dust outline from where I lay like a desert homicide had occurred in the night. I'm surprised I slept at all as the fan at the bottom of my bunk kept blowing up my pants and inflating them like a wind sock. Some say refreshing I say f**kin annoying. Hampi was cool like Bedrock meets Jungle book. Huge boulders litter the bright green banana plantaions and the air doesn't move. A big river runs through and all day is filled with the village boys swimming and diving and doing international small boy mischief. No girls aloud. I wanted to swim so badly!! It was the first river I'd seen in India I actually wanted to swim in as most are 10%water 90%poo. And under a Mango tree in the midday sun I met Fingal Pollack, a girl who was at Uni when I was and who has on multiple occations annoyed me so much I almost killed her. Some things don't change. So I ran away from her interpretive dancing ways and now am in Mysore where so far toured the Maharaja's palace, rolled my own insense, brought some grapes, ate some grapes, vomited some grapes and sat and watched the lightning and thunder of a monsoon downpour. Same old same old really. You guys aren't missing anything.

Wake me up before you Goa

2006-05-01T21:13:00.000-07:00

Im in Panjim the capital of Goa....its crazy hot and this is on the coast! I
hired the OLDEST bike in the world for 3 days at the whopping cost of 8o
rupees! and cycled the 20 or so km to old Goa which has some of the states
best churches. Huge portugese built basilicas and nunnerys and the remains
of St Fransis Xavier in a glass coffin. He's a youthful 400 years old....looking a little dry there Frankie!
My bum has never been so sore! Even though I padded the seat with my as yet
unused bag of foot wool and my wee towel all taped up with medical tape.ahh Kiwi ingenuity. My bike was awsome, it was so rusty, the front brake didnt work and the handle bars and the front wheel pointed in different directions so to go straight i had to hang a constant left.I really wanted a picture of me with it but my camera only works 40% of the time and i cant do it myself and dont trust giving it to anyone else to do.

My camera is driving me mad. it goes then switchs off, then won't go then I
wiggle the battery and it goes then just as my picture is lined up it stops,
sitches off but is still open so I have to open the battery wiggle it and
make it go just to turn it off!! SO FRUSTRATING!!! I have hardly any
pictures and none of me doing anything. As it's the low season there is
hardly another tourist around to take one for me

I was going to leave tommorrow but my train to Hampi doesnt go until
Wednesday in the early morning. so another day...its like the Nelson of India.
and its the first place in India that actully looks like it would be a nice
place to live! When I first got here I went straight out to Arambol one of the beaches. I was there one night before I turned around and came back. It was gross. Too many tourists mostly beet red Poms, gross water and the most seedy atmosphere ever. Nice and cool but i haven't been into the really hot middle of India yet so maybe i'll hit the coast after that.

Went to the market in Mapsa this morning about a half hour bus away. Loaded
up with cucumber and rolls and oranges for the train. Had trouble with a guy who keep bumping into me and then hissing "nice boobs" in my face loudly. I ignored him as I was having a good time with my new friend Deepak (11 year old boy who helped me find stuff "no Deepak I dont want sweets!") but about the 5th time I saw him coming, stopped and yelled "do you think I dont see you" he kept coming so I shoved him away really hard in the chest. It made the biggest sound and he went flying!!!!! Everyone stopped and looked and Deepak was most impressed although at first confused as to why I did it. when I explained he had said bad things to me he yelled " bam like bruce lee!" then when we kept meeting his other little friends he would tell them the story always ending with "bam like bruce lee!"
guess im just amzing!!! the guys here are sleazy as but I seem to scare them
somewhat. Everytime I catch a glimse of myself in a bus window or mirror I
look so feirce!! Like I am waiting for someone to piss me off so I can stab
them!!! Its not how I feel, it's just my defence! Its working. and I do have
my knife in my pocket. Mostly its stareing and following. Sometimes it muttering but the worst is the groping or leaning. Guys on buses who edge closer and closer to you till they have an arm or shoulder against your chest. yeah smooth moves. i have actully poked some guy with my knife. I opened it inside my bag then gave him a little stab through the side. He jumped a mile while I looked blank. Serves you right you dirty pervert. I took a motorcycle taxi and the driver kept moving further and further back until i was hanging off the back by the skin of my teeth. When he had no luck that way he started to lean right back till he was practicaly lieing right down. I hardly wanted to stab someone who was driving the bike i was on (well i wanted too but safety first) so i pretended i saw a friend and jumped off. Almost no females travel here alone so I have to have my defence mechanisms in place. Besides who doesnt enjoy a little stabbing!

People always ask the same 3 questions....what is your good name? where are
you from? and are you alone? my good name is Jim, I am from NZ and i am here
with my boyfriend Jake who i am meeting in 10 minutes (safety,safety!!). This Jake guy who although fictional gets asked about more than anything as people tend to move the conversation towards the males in my life, eg my dad, grandfather or pretend husband/boyfriend, never mind about me. He is a moterbike race driver (well if I can just make it up why not!!) and very smart. and yes he does like me even thought I'm a big girl ( this was an actual conversation). "Are you married" is usally the fourth question and although Jake and I started out being married I did have to recreate my entire wedding for one woman on a bus (it was beautiful...you guys were all there) and that's more effort than I am willing to put in even for a dreamboat like Fake Jake.

kathmandu F**K YEAH

2006-04-25T04:38:00.000-07:00

welcome back to beautiful democracy Nepal.... 'long live the king' haha

i hope u all get back to work asap...

good luck with the pitfalls of democracy and supposed political autonomy

i hope the tourists come flooding back..."sometimes trekking, sometimes rafting"

love from
angus

Hot in New Dehli Tonight

2006-04-22T23:47:00.000-07:00

I like flying. I even like turbulance. I dont mind the enclosed space. But I will say I was less than reassured when I got on Cosmic Air flight N630 and my seat kept falling apart. I don't usally have problems with my super strength (jim hulk smash!) so imagine my surprise when the entire armrest came off in my hand. My tray table was taped up and I found if I leant back even the slightest amount my chair would recline all the way back to horizontal which made the G-forces of takeoff rather hard to resist as I leant foward gripping the remaining armrest as we launched ourselves in the thunder and lightning of a tropical thunderstorm. The entire cabin was lined with advertising for two minute noodles and with the rattling progress, the cheap grey vinal seats and florescent strip-lighting flickering on and off, it was very like flying through a storm in a subway car.

Delhi - "Captial city! in both meanings of the word" so says my taxi driver

If I drank five bottles of water an hour I would still be thirsty....it's that damm hot. And although I hate to break the image you all must have of me being a forever chic, graceful and collected young woman I'm sweating like a geriatric rickshaw driver, I smell terrable, have hairy hippy legs and have a big blister in my toe which I have named Mitch Bucanan. So pretty normal.
The heat is amazing and so is Delhi. Its like Nepal times 100. Everything is more; more traffic, more dogs, more cows, more cars, more beggers (ironicly with less limbs) more heat, more dirt and more being yelled at by everyone. Yay! its awsome. Things are intensified....that's not just a bad smell, that's the WORST smell you ever smelt. I wandered about this morning to enjoy a Masala Dosa which is the traditional street vendor breakfast offering. A big crispy pancake filled with masala spiced potatos and onions then folded and served with coconut chutney and "mystery orange stuff" which i took a big bite of and almost blew my head off.Future note to self: if its bright red or orange proceed with caution. Which is why the sweet lassi was on hand. Lassi comes in salted or sweet variteys and is basically a big glass of runny drinkable yogurt, at the fancier places its sprinkled with chopped pistachios.
Gotta work out this railway system if I want to succesfull take a 25 hour train to Goa. I dont really relish the idea of getting that wrong and relising it 23 hours into the trip.

Well I'm off to wander again, these beggers won't beat themselves

don't look yak in anger

2006-04-19T20:44:00.000-07:00

im back in waipukurau,,,i just got back from shooting swans with a twelve gauge shot gun with brother hads. Since i got back last night i have had two custard squares, a chicken (yes chicken) roll, cassarole, and a chicken sandwich...oh ..and a bundaburg ginger beer....wowza...the taste of home..i officially lost 4kg in nepal..and now IM GONNA PUT IT RIGHT BACK ON...yeah

ron burgundy is running like a tight formula one vehicle..and i have yet to see a roach in my bed room.

Nepal really makes me appreciate the little things. I accidentally gave dad my departure date rather than my arrival date so he tried to pick me up a day early..was a bit stressed when he met me the next day.(for some reason?)so apologies for that..my bad

i killed three big roached in my hostel in bangkok, and had to fix the toilet cistern...my time at plumbing world came in handy

gotta go ..tv to inspect

from roy orbison

Saturday's alright for fighting!!

2006-04-17T22:25:00.000-07:00

From this picture you can tell no-one knows who to hug first! awwwww

Angus Walker has left the building.
Due in marital problems Mr and Mrs S have parted company. In the ongoing battle for the custody of nations Ms J. Stanton has will take charge of Nepal and India for the time being and Mr A. Walker will resume custody of New Zealand.

Anyway....As Angus flew away I was undergoing the ordeal of trying to get an Indian Visa. To call it a system would be a massive LIE!! not helped by (brace yourself for massive culteral generalisations) huge groups of israilis who everytime they were told something by the officials at the gate or window, would tell each other but not the handful of others that were there. I arrived at 8 am to already a huge crowd had formed covering the pavement and up the road from the empressive gates of the Indian Embassy. After numerous attempts to form a line (that didnt work!!) they let us in bit by bit. The Embassy is only open fron 9.30 to 12.30 so if you cant fight the crowds in that time you have to come back the next day and do it all over again. Highlights included spotting a pair of brass knuckles hidden in a pot of magnolias (?!?) and a very vocal german man who started shouting at the isralis who were jumping the queue telling them they were dirty and stupid and all looked the same. If that wasnt going to inflame the situation maybe mentioning somthing along the lines of Gaza strip and concentration camps was. We (non-isralis) started to edge away from him at that point....soon after a scuffle broke out. suprise suprise. i should have grabbed those brass knukles while i had the chance. but i made it!! with the banding together of some brits and I (thank god for my 'cute" kiwi accent) we got stage one down but that means another two days of standing for hours pressed intimitly agains a crowd of others (YES!)
Meanwhile.....Back in Thamel Angus off to the airport and demonstrations broke out in Thamel (tourist central) Now this is big news as not only did the police strike some tourist bystanders (big nono) but Thamel has always been a world away from the demonstrations in the city. Up till now all the shop fronts have been closed during the day and thats been it...nothing but an inconvinance but now things are a little more close to home. piles and piles of rubbish are collecting in the street as the essential services are slowing down and the price off fresh fruit and vege is rising as transport can't get into the Kathmandu valley anymore. Rumours are rife over if the government will impose a state of emergency which would mean no flights or anything. all domestic flights have been cancelled and buses stopped a long time before. Roads are off limits to all but a few specially designated buses and taxis for tourists between the airport and Thamel. So happy happy blossum harvest funtimes number one!

well i better go. the A-team is on and sometimes its in hindi and sometimes english! its like a pot-luck suprise as to which it will be. Huzzah! Being stuck sucks on a rainy day. Fool.

return of the yak

2006-04-11T21:30:00.000-07:00

some big, big mountains o' snow

John, Sarah, Jim, and Kaji Sherpa, (half man half yak)

well now that my motions have ceased (yeah ..its angus..hahaha)
i have the chance to balance some of the late jim wa's one sided journalism..because im a nice guy really...eh jim.. rash has gone and im clean, and yes i smell of versace blue jeans.......IM HOT...and thanks to my nightly routine of purging i probably weigh about 2 -3 kg less..

jims just jealous cause she still smelled of FUNK when i was with the roses

so ...im no hero. i shelled out the $10NZ per day for buddhi to haul my extensive range of cosmetics and narcotics to the top.. (and the best thing is...i feel not the slightest incling of guilt! im really finding myself on this trip!)

the views were amazing, and the company was pretty sweet too...man ..we ran out of yak puns ...thats commitment kids!

if yo eva in dis hood, yall be sure-wa to try that BUFFALO STeAK...ohhh yeah...flag dat yak..go that buffalo...i swear that be converting vegans daily

jims cut my lunch on much of this new stuff..which is good because i need to inhale some solids if ya know what im sayin...likely moving to Freak Street this arvo..the famous hippie part of town..yay go liberalism, and prayer beads...hahahahaha
at least jim wont feel so stinky there!!!hahahaha

more from me as news of no consequence unfolds

SEACREST OUT

Brokeback Sherpa

2006-04-11T00:38:00.000-07:00

Kaji Sherpa, and Buddhi the porter display platonic relations on the mountain in the sun.

Well.14 days of back to back treking.....That was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I have never been so tired in all my life....or smelt as bad....or looked worse....or wanted to eat a yak more.
I could break it down for you exciting 8 hours of walking ( sorry dragging up my weary carcass) day by day. But in my head its just one giant blur...It took us 10 days to get up to base camp, fighting altitude the whole way and only 4 days down which gives you a slight indication of how steep that is. The thin air makes each step so hard as each breath is a fraction of the air you need. You lose you appetite, and your head aches and in the case of Angus Walker you get so damm sunburned you spend most of the trip looking like a crude Halloween devil. On a positive note the fact that most of his nose therefore came off with intense peeling seems to have put the nose rash on the run. Ah the good with the bad.
Kaji Sherpa our guide and Bohddi our porter were awesome! Two super fit guys who patiently waited for us to crawl to the top all the while actually finding endless yak puns funny (the pinnacle of these being "the highest Yak-olade that a Yak-tor can Yak-cept is a Yak-cadamy Award." or the Yak roll call as the trains of yaks squeezed by us on a high mountain trail " Yak Black, Michael Yakson, Yakie Onnassis, Old Yak Donald etc..." Yeah I know hilarious but with a lack of oxygen you'd be surprised just how deeply amusing....oh how we laughed.
The not washing situation was a particularly special one. I was actually a little too comfortable to start with the fact that i hadn't changed my clothes until Angus revealed that he wasn't even changing his undies! Then I felt like a real cope out! I may have looked like a feral yeti woman on the outside but my underwear was persil fresh! I even washed my clothes at one point at a spring chunky with ice. I couldn't feel my hands it was so cold all the while muttering "why am i even bothering, stupid Ang-wa not even changing his rank undies,who smells?huh?, dumb facial rash that's who" (as a side note my hands got so cold i panicked over potential frostbite never play the violin again senarios and huddled by the smoky kitchen fire to save my maestro hands....Meanwhile outside.....A freakin Yak ate my soap. Bastard. much amusement to the locals as I chased it around yelling "You ate my soap you yak-en Yak?!?!")
Anyway.....We were trekking with a English couple from Lancaster who were both good sorts. Left us in the dust though. Many theories were postulated over the likelihood of Sarah actually being a Yak-woman...hmmmm. She cheerily ate enough for the four of us, practically ran up the mountain and suffered not from the perils of altitude sickness. Not only that but at the very top at Base Camp managed to get the altitude and cold delirious John to propose marriage which she promptly accepted! Sneaky brits! (side note 2#: I tried also but Angus just thought i was talking to a yak. I was very tired. I may have been.)
Kaji our guide was a sherpa legend! He weighs 60 kilos (kaji says "some times I'm fat. I weight maybe 63 kilo") and is a true man of the mountain. With a wicked sense of humor he would laugh every time we rolled out the same old running jokes about being haunted by momos (meat filled dumplings) and yak marriage and me not giving up my bag despite being asked a million times a day! (side note #3 I, Jim Stanton Carried my own pack all the way and back!!!!!i'm stoked!!!and maybe a wee bit insane! Considering it costs NZ$9.50 per day not to. BUT I DID NOT CRUMBLE! Sight beyond sight! I of Jim-deera! I am JIM hear me roar!.....etc etc etc)
OK yeah Kaji was like a alpine Pat Morana with Buddhist wisdom issuing forth from his wind chapped lips "Maybe Jim-didi when trek over you be fit and not so fat anymore" yes well and Yetis are real. He and Bohddi our porter both laughed their way over the mountain trails as we struggled to keep them in sight. They seemed to have a great time. In fact at times we seemed to be encroaching into their romantic getaway. Nepali Men are very touchy feely with each other.Very. and so we will just put it all down to just Nepali friendly touching....and bunk sharing and on one memorable cinema-esqe running giggling over the hills hand in hand . So Brokeback Sherpa right now!
Right at the top on the last day at high altitude I got up at 5am in the dark and attempted Kala Patter the peak above base camp where the best views of Everest at dawn can be seen. It was harder mental battle with myself than the time when i ran out of cheese and wanted to steal some of Jareds from the fridge. I didn't want to Jared. I have an addiction. I fought myself the whole way up. Half way burst into tears. Quickly stopped when i realized such weakness was making my eyes freeze (yes really) and after 2 and a half hours of slogging up through the snow I made it. It was so quiet apart from the farts and belches of a Belgian photographer (note: don't order the spicy noodles at Gorak Shep), around the summit was an unbroken line of Everest and its attendant peaks. I could wail on about being humbled and feeling tiny and insignificant yada yada but it was so cold i thought my bum was frozen. I know cynical as always. I was all those things but in quick succession, followed but speedy photos ,a small pause broken by yet more European wind (woah buddy take a tums) and then down again. Low on energy but high on.....no not life but MASSIVE EGO!!! My first words to Angus may have been " IN YOUR FACE RASHY. I"M AWESOME!!!"

Anyway as I said the descent was quick and our recovery quicker.Nothing signals back to normal for two young Kiwis than a hearty meal of mashed potato and Yak steak. We flew out of Lukla early in the morning happy to be heading towards the big city, fresh clothes,warm weather and good food.......Suckers!!!! We flew into a city on lock down...and not on the good cruising round with the top down way. The entire city of Kathmandu is closed from 10am till 6pm then again from 11pm till 5am.Soilders question any local out at these times. Imagine Wellington with no one at work, no cars and house arrest. BORING. and sinister. Across the city away from us are lage demonstrations with wounded on both sides. Three shot in a near by demonstration yesterday. As westeners we are safe, the area we are in is secure and we can go where we please. The curfew means narrow windows of snack buying and money changingand long streches of sitting in our hotel room and eating pringles. Also my clean clothes and shampoos and crap were safely locked up, real safe where even i couldn't get them till the next day. Its all very well to trek and smell in the freezing cold but sitting in a bar with a fresh clean Angus who is loving each opportunity to wrinkle his rash free nose and say "Man did i smell like that" and "Whoa You stink" (ever the smooth operator is Angus Walker). So its no surprise that my good friend kharma is on his case and has given his a intensive bout of food poisoning. Poor guy. Currently sleeping after a night of the loudest vomiting i have ever heard (and i have heard some of the greats ie Ben Hurley) he has suffered since we arrived, more so due to the fact i have been 100% fine. Headlines read "Toilet paper sales are on the rise thanks to Kiwi input"...or maybe output.
Well i should be off to wander again. The streets are empty save for jeeps of soldiers and the odd lost looking taxi. Its slightly disconcerting to be strolling down a crooked potholed back street, bogenvillia up the wall and a warm dog sleeping in the gutter only to be stopped by.....Oh look a machine gun mounted jeep full of rifle touting soldiers. How quaint. Nepali charm at its best

(side note #4: i have been on the net for 2hours 35 minutes at the cost of 75 rupees...thats NZ$1.15)

i want my molenburg

2006-03-25T22:46:00.002-08:00

finally submitted to the dreaded rickshaw bike ride tour with the sleaziest nepali man i evva saw. went all round the city for $6 ..350 rupees ..which i was later informed was a total f***ING RIPOFF.. so im not a hardened traveller!

on the mission preparing for our 'suicide trek' (i still puff a bit walking up the stairs past the resident evil massage parlour) which begins tomorrow morning.

got literary today for a while at the most Xtreme book shop in kathmandu, (they even made jim put her shoplifting bag behind the counter.

jim cranked the funniest discovery in the form of the official authorised "LITTLE BOOK OF calm" ...funny huh? yeah

bought 'zen flesh zen bones' a newer edition of a book i borrowed off mary wark in nz...this marks the begining of my realisation of spiritual enlightenment..and stuff

jim is as grumpy as ever..although not suffering from facial or gastric complications as her travel minion is.. i had to finish jims buffalo 'really red sauce' steak as well as my own 'brown sauce steak' last night before walking home in pitch black due to the electricity thing ..

have nick named the local rooster 'scotty dont' in loving memory of the infamous 'panel and paint' mastermind

getting washing done today.. and trying to see how we can drop a collective 14kg from our already bare essential luggage for our trip. and my ipod dosnt work for some reason...the battery thing isnt up to the challenge..

man ,..the pancakes here are thick as..they were like cakes.. jim and i both had to admit defeat.. happening a bit recently..i think im loosing my appetite, (maybe)

how are the black caps doing against the windies?

this is rashy signin off

more about our designer mountaineering fashions later in the show

Nice chucks!

2006-03-24T20:11:00.000-08:00

Hey those are my shoes.Give them back.They dont even fit you. You are a small Nepali orphan!
Angus breifly donated his shoes to charity. Then he took them back.

i dont have alot to add, as jim bot as it covered dont she. I will say this how ever..i was under the impression that the rooster only did his thing for a while while the sun comes up..not all day..by gones

i had the "HEAVEY BREAKFAST" this fine morn and im now a bit bloated.. i think im a begging target here..i must look like i have money or suming...CRAZY.. its world gone mad

facial rash is the worst EVER...

like i says... 'may hats off to you boy, cause i aint never had to drink this yellow water'

we will deal with matters of more importance to the nation

It's a hard knock life...for rich westerners...like us

2006-03-24T19:54:00.000-08:00

Angus and I are now living the sweet life. Its hard when you have no job and all you have to do all day is walk around and eat and then sleep off that big lunch that cost you $2.40. Also after having our jet lag (i say our i mean his, im fine!) made worse by the fact that our room had no window to the outside so we decided to ask if the room next door was free...Boy was it ever now we enjoy a large bathroom (no more tripping over the toilet while showering) and a big room with......a small table!! and the blessed window to the outside world. I sent Angus (*sound of cracking whip*)to negotiate this and the hostel guy wasn't so keen but when I made appearance my womanly form and femmine charms obviously had their effect and we got it all for 250 rupees which is $2.50 each. Does this bode well in an establishment where we are told a girl was attacked recently?
While the aforementioned lazyness is true we have dragged our lethagic carcasses out to get organised. We met up early on with Kaji Sherpa the guide who took my dad and sister when they treked Everest in November. Dad had wanted me to meet up with him to say hi and we straight way could see that he was a good guy and found ourselves being given the hard sell be his boss. After a breif but intense dialoge that covered such points as "special sherpa medicine", the great rescue service offered if we fall over a cliff and the suggestion that as I am abit of a fatty i wouldnt be able to carry very much, we were convinced. So on Monday we fly out to Lukla to start a 19 day loop trek that takes us up to Everest base camp over the blahblah pass down through somethingorrather visiting whatsaname and yadayada on the way. Sounds vague-tastic does it not!
Also now that Angus has left to wander off down the street I can take the time to make fun of his nose rash! Ha hilarious!! He seems to be coping just fine with adjusting to life here although we are still in Thamel which really serves as the buffer zone between us and Nepal proper......hehe nose rash! Everytime he talks to someone he adds "cheers bro" to the end of it and noone understands. Often i forget to wait for him and turn around to find him with struggling with ignoring the hordes of begging women and children. And desipe warnings he has made friends with the creepiest rickshaw driver in Kathmandu and yesterday was a little hesitant to leave the hostel in fear of being accosted. He can only keep promising to go for a ride with this guy for so long.

radio kathmanduuuuuu

2006-03-22T20:48:00.000-08:00

hey ya....hey ya

i have become a morning person. i sit on 'my' balcony and write my diary while listening to a solo rooster belt out the 'open your eyes', of nepal.
Things smell different here.. a mixture of corriander, insense, and fly-ridden meat.
Its the perfect tourist temperature..mid 20s most the time, and just like boarding school days of old ....the showers are cold,..(not communal)

in the matter of health jim bot and i are fine although.. i did have to run out of the internet cafe yesterday... its quit scary in our 'flat' in the dark..and power cuts are sporadic to say the least..everyone here is a commision based sales man...(my favourite,..eh dad!) and tourist

OK THIS IS EXACLY WHEN THE GENERATOR AT THE INTERNET CAFE RAN OUT... SO HERE IS WHAT IM WRITING THE NEXT DAY... (BY THE WAY....IM OBVIOUSLY NOT JIM...)

Got very 'rangi Changi' last night..so a little fragile this morn. I went looking for sandals and ended up halfway to india, before i admitted to myself that i may be a little bit lost.. got a good deal..600 rupee "teva" scandals..(thats like $12) OUCH

got back to 'flat' on a rickshaw (three wheel bike for those who didnt already know) took me straight to my door for 2 bucks..money well spent me thinks.

quite weary of the hard sell locals now, and find it hard to ignore the poverty i see all around. I really have to consciously avoid getting 'sucked in', as even a thick layer of cynicism is not enough to avoid a feeling of 'western guilt' for the tough situation that many locals face..esp due to a major drop off in tourist numbers..

so when i was bartering for incence ten minutes ago over a 20c difference in price, its hard not to be struck with the inherent catch 22 of tourism in such a bustling and vibrant city as this.

Cant help but wonder what it would be like if some of our beloved readers were here, as it is about as different as you can get...yet incredibly welcoming

turns out , not working for three months is a better idea than i initially thought!!!

gotta go, things to see, bargans to avoid

big shout out to BOB DOG...my little man..you would fit in well here you mangy little oppotunist!

love from uncle angus

A Bangkok Minute

2006-03-22T20:26:00.000-08:00

Firstly....we hadn't made it out of the country before Ang-wa realised he had left his jacket behind. Secondly...We couldnt find out hostel once we made it to Bangkok. And thirdly Jim was fool enough to leave her pocket knife in her hand luggage and so was suspected of being a terroist (well I do look quite the arab after a 12 hour flight)

One Night in Bankok makes a hard man humble.
Oh the heat! like walking in warm soupy air. We took the airport bus after being told it was going to stop across the road from our hostel. Hurrah what conveniance until they kicked us out in the Ghetto of eastern Bangkok. Who knows why....maybe we just looked too damm excited. I blame Angus. Thats why i brought him. Anyway after watching the bus drive off into the night we looked around and it was apparant from the lady man ladys and lack of anything resembeling the given landmarks we found the only man in Thailand who looked EXACTLY like James Brown and politely enquired "do pardon me but where the f**k are we?"...into a taxi we were put and away.....
The hostel was small, smelled of bleach and was fantastic to finally find even if the journey had meant an impromtue tour of the city and an elephant sighting. Just shambaling across the street doing his bad ass elephant thing. Morning bought a streetside breakfast of deep fried dough and for the more culineray adventurous (Angus) mystery meat. Little did i know that very morning Angus had unwittingly brushed his teeth with what passes for water in Thailand.......fool.

3 pairs of socks and a t-shirt

2006-03-19T04:16:00.000-08:00

Well it's only ten more hours of A grade first world luxury till we fly off into the void and my shit is still unpacked and lying all over my bedroom floor. I'm sure I made outrageous claims of packing light and in all likelihood believed them but alas this has not made such claims real. Do I really need pants? and shoes? Black tie formal in case i catch the King's eye! Could I possably get away with not brushing my teeth till June....hmmm all things to ponder.
Dental heigene aside I can't wait to get back to Nepal. I remember the surreal blur of the taxi ride from the airport. Oppresive heat, dust, crowds of people and...wait a REAL leper!!!
But I'm not there yet. I have to get out of the country, through Bangkok customs with Angus and his catche of drugs, survive the proverbial one night in Bangkok and make it to the final destination.
So bear with me, it will be hard, physicaly and mentally........treking, foreign customs and 3 months and no Shortland Street.......

2006-03-11T04:02:00.000-08:00

Jim was already easing her way into a laxative habit